Treasuring Her Heart

Treasuring Her Heart

“I know how young men are. They want to win your heart but they don’t know how to treasure it.”

Winning is what guys like to do, on the basketball court, on the ball diamond or on the football field. It is the triumph of athletic prowess, determination, and even ego. It sets us apart from the defeated, from the spectators, and from wannabees. At least for the moment, winning makes us men. It doesn’t matter if we are 30, 20 or just 10 years old, if we have ever faced the glare of the competition, and met the threats and challenges with a bold courage that carried us to victory, we know the glory of the winners circle.

That is the idea behind the statement about a boy winning a girl’s heart but not treasuring it. It comes from the movie, Courageous, and is spoken from a father to his fifteen year old daughter.

Photo compliments of Jhen Stark Photography

In the movie an innocent fifteen year old girl is being pursued by a seventeen year old boy. Due to a combination of factors, including he boy’s size, older age, and suave personna, she is mesmerized by him. But one thing stands in the way of the girl entering a relationship with him: her parents. Mom and dad have ruled that she can not see boys until she is seventeen years old.

This edict of the parents is challenged when the boy arrives unannounced at the family home. The girl answers the door and steps out side to visit with her caller. He invites her out for something to eat, an invitation she is dying to accept. But the girl’s father is a bit more conscientious than she wishes he would be, and he steps outside to monitor the situation.

“Get back inside,” he tells her. Then, turning to the young man he asks, “What is your interest in my daughter?” Of course, we all know, but this courageous dad mans up and tells the would-be-suitor, “It’s not going to happen. Not on my watch.” The scene ends with an angry young man mouthing off to the dad as he stomps off. “You should let her make her own decisions!” he yells. This is not a very intelligent way to impress the father of the girl he is interested in.

Later in the movie the dad has taken his daughter out to a nice restaurant. “I want to treat you as the young lady you are,” he tells her. He puts a ring on her finger and tells her she is to wear it until a worthy young man replaces it with a wedding ring. Though there has been tension between the father and daughter because he has not allowed her to start dating at age 15, the girl still has respect for him because he has been a strong male figure in the home. He has stood up to her demands for more freedom and has stood up to the impestuous young man who came knocking at the door. So the dad has built a foundation of trust and respect that sustains the relationship even when it is strained. It is at this point that the dad looks at his daughter and says, ““I know how young men are. They want to win your heart but they don’t know how to treasure it.”

This is not a condemnation of boys. This father also has two sons, so he is not against boys. It is just a recognition that in their youth and immaturity, teenage boys understand winning more than they understand treasuring. The spirit of competition and victory that prevail in the sports arena works wonderfully there, but it doesn’t transfer well to dating relationships. Dating triumphs invariably lead to broken hearts, broken spirits, and sometimes broken bodies. Too many young men simply don’t understand that, either because they haven’t been taught that by their own fathers, or because they are still immature.

Photo Compliments of Jhen Stark Photography

That is where strong dads have to step in, dads like this one in the movie, dads who vow to protect the lives and bodies of the daughters God has entrusted to their care. And hopefully, one day when she is older, a young man who has been trained by his dad in how to love, cherish and honor a girl, will knock on her door. And if he has a godly spirit, respects her moral convictions, and shows interest to last a life time, she might even open her heart to him.

Warren Baldwin

1948 Video on Freedom

1948 Video on Freedom

The following video was made in 1948 by Harding College. I am teaching an American History course right now and it is amazing how some of the things we study about the philosophy of America's founders come out in this little clip.

As you watch it, remember that it was made in 1948.




The middle class has always been the backbone of this country. The middle class produces the workers that plow the fields, build the houses, stitch the clothing, etc. If we ever lose the middle class (through taxing them out of business, outsourcing their jobs, controlling their production, or subjecting them to state-financed foreign competition), we lost the country to the elitists, the very people whom Thomas Jefferson warned us about.

The issue in America is less about Democrat vs. Republican. It is much more about working man (with freedom and property rights) vs. elitist (the super wealthy and powerful who want to control everything). Isn't that the same issue that plagued Israel during the time of Isaiah, Amos and Hosea?

Warren

Bear Attack in Home

It’s happened again, another black bear attack. But this one is different from some of the others we’ve heard about this year. This one didn’t happen on a mountain trail. It happened in someone’s living room.

“It was a typical morning Monday at the home of Rich and Angie Moyer in Newport, Pa. Rich was getting ready for work and let the family’s dog Bindy out for a run. But the dog came running in through the back door minutes later, with a black bear in hot pursuit. The bear quickly changed its target from the dog to Rich. “All I saw was a bunch of black hair,” Moyer said.

Angie Moyer heard the commotion downstairs and went to investigate. But the bear went from wrestling with Rich to attacking Angie. “(The bear) knocked me down,” she said. “I was down on the ground wrestling with it in front of the door.” The bear then dragged Angie outside onto the patio. “(Then) my husband, my hero, came and jumped and knocked the bear off of me,” she said. And that’s when Rich — a formidable 6-foot-6 inches and 300 pounds — suffered a brutal mauling at the paws of the attacking bruin. “I kept my head down the whole time, so the bear wouldn’t rip my face up,” he said. “It literally ripped the back of my head instead… (I was) feeling the hair pull. I thought it was the end.

But the bear ceased its attack, leaving Rich Moyer alive but severely worse for wear. It took 37 sutures to close the wound on the back of his head, and he was treated for numerous scratches and 20 puncture wounds from the bear’s bites. Angie likewise didn’t emerge unscathed; the bear took out a chunk of her buttock and she also suffered other bites on her body. “Part of me thinks we saved each other ... Rich. “If you love each other, you are just going to jump in.”

“A lot of times men aren’t as caring, especially over the years. I think that is going to change.”Angie said. “He’s more my hero than I’m his.” She added that she is looking at her husband in a whole new way. “I have to admit I take him for granted sometimes,” she said. “I have to change a little bit in light of this. It made me see the light, too.”

The couple is still faced with some heavy fallout from the bear invasion. Rich and Angie racked up high medical bills from their injuries. And get a load of this — homeowners’ insurance doesn’t cover bear attacks inside the house. This to me is one of the most interesting aspects of this whole story. Can you imagine that when some insurance guys were figuring out the policy they would offer the public someone said, “Ok, we will cover bear attacks, but not if they occur inside the house.” That is amazing. Like, how many of them actually happen? “Sorry folks, if the bear attacks you in your yard, you are covered. But if it happens inside the house, too bad.

The Moyers have new fears for their 10-year-old son Josh, who surprisingly slept through the attack upstairs in the home. Mom told her son he was never going outside again. I’m sure that will change.
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/44783872/ns/today-today_people/t/couple-attacked-bear-home-we-saved-each-other?gt1=43001#

I’ve done a couple of bear attack stories this year. There has been many of them, and, since I’m interested in bears and big cats, I gravitate to stories about them.


There are three things we can learn from this story of the bear attack in the home of Rich and Angie Moyer. One, if you live in Pennsylvania, buy a bear tag this hunting season. I would.


Two, God can work through any circumstance to produce good. Rom.8:28 says that. As horrible as the bear attack was, it has brought Rich and Angie closer together.


Three, if your marriage needs rejuvenation, you have another option to spruce it up. You can go to a counselor or marriage retreat. Or, just rent a cabin in Pennsylvania ... and leave the front door open. Some black bear may visit and bring you much closer together!


Warren Baldwin

Guest Marriage Post: Joanne Kraft

Are You a Burden or a Blessing?

The ref blew the final whistle and parents on our sideline cheered our victory—Paul and I cheered for a much different reason. The last day of soccer season is a joyous day for my husband and I, and that Saturday was no exception.


But, before we could get too excited, there was still the team party to attend. I’d printed off a coupon that would give us two large pizza’s for $20.00.

Unfortunately, when my husband made his way through the long line of families at the pizza parlor, he was told by the gal at the register, “You’re total is $38.00.”

“What?” Paul was taken aback, and I was beckoned with a head nod and a fast wave of his hand.

“I thought you said this was going to be only $20.00?”

“Oh no. I left the coupon in the car,” I told him, already trying to head toward the parking lot.

“Don’t bother getting it. Do you see how long this line is? I am not about to make all of these people wait for us,” He replied angrily.

It didn’t help matters when five hours later we were at the grocery store where I’d thought we were eligible for a free turkey. When the clerk charged us for the turkey and explained how I’d confused the deal they were having, my husband was fit to be tied.

As you can imagine, I was not having a very good day and neither was he. When we discussed the incidents later, I apologized and he shared, “I’m having a hard time seeing where you helped me today. You are making mistakes that create a financial burden for me. I know you didn’t do anything intentionally, but these kinds of things are happening a lot.”

He was right. Lately I wasn’t focused on ways I could help him. Sure, I kept the house picked up and made his lunch from time to time, but how was I intentionally trying to make his life easier?

The truth was, I wasn’t.

And the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone.
I will make a companion who will help him."
Genesis 2:18 NLT

God’s Word tells me I was created to be not only Paul's friend, but that I was designed to be a help to him as well. When Paul shared how I had created a burden for him, I felt terrible. And, I admit…there were a few tears. He is my best friend. I want his life to be easier when I’m a part of it, not more difficult.


It got me to thinking, how can I be a help to him? As his wife, I shouldn't be his burden-maker, I should be a bearer of his blessings.

I thought I’d share a few ways I’ve learned to be a blessing instead of a burden to the man God intentionally created me for.


· Follow-Thru. I have quite a few to-do's on my housework list. Many of which I've shared with my husband; organize our closet, clean out our pantry, clean the bonus room, go through the kids old clothes. It's time I became a woman of my word and began to tackle a few of those tasks. After all, he was thrilled when I organized our silverware drawer. I'm sure he'd be elated to discover his socks all in one place again.


· Focus. Quite often I give my husband only one ear when he's talking to me. It's frustrating for him to share a story when I ask him to repeat himself over and over again. Focusing on what I'm doing also helps me to remember coupons in the car and read the fine print about turkey sales at the grocery store.


· Find. Find ways to help. Now, each morning I try to ask, "What can I do to help you today?" You'll be amazed to discover how your husband appreciates being asked this question.


· Fill. My words can be life-giving when I fill my mouth with inspiration and encouragement. There is nothing more taxing on a man than a woman who nitpicks and complains. I need to fill my husband’s ears with those life-giving words.


· Fun. When Paul wants to relax and have fun—I want to be who he thinks of first. For fun I take him out for a coffee date, walk up and surprise him with a kiss and a cuddle, or leave a sticky-note somewhere on his office desk at home. I’ve even surprised him with ice cream and a movie in bed.

So many families today are struggling to keep their financial heads above the rising economical tide. It is no surprise that it's one of the biggest stressors in a marriage. Whether your husband is sensitive to finances in your home, a new job situation, or is just over-worked and stretched to his limit, you are his helper, the one God created to stand shoulder to shoulder and carry the load together.

How about you? Is there a way you can bless your spouse today?


Joanne Kraft

Joanne is passionate about encouraging women, especially moms; encouraging them through her gift of transparency and humor. Her nonfiction book, The Radical Sabbatical – How to Journey From Busy to Blessing, Beacon Hill Press, came out in June 2011. Joanne has been published by In Touch, Today's Christian Woman, ParentLife, Kyria, and P31 Woman magazines. She has four children and is married to an amazing man who shares her love of coffee shops and bookstores. You can find her hiding from her kids and housework over at her blogs Blessed and Grace and Truth Living.


Click here to order Joanne's book on Amazon.com.

As The Deer

As The Deer

“As the deer pants for the water so my soul longs after you, you alone are my hearts desire and I long to worship you. You alone are my strength, my shield, to you alone may my spirit yield. You alone are my hearts desire and I long to worship you.”

This is the first stanza and chorus of one of my favorite songs. It is called As The Deer, and the first stanza is based on Psalm 42:1&2. “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God, when can I go and meet with God?”

Panting is not attractive, but it’s not meant to be. Panting is a body’s desperate cry for water to quench thirst. Left unquenched, the deer, or a human, could die.

Photo Compliments of Oz Girl's Photo Shop

We don’t know what emotional or physical assault beats against the life of the writer of this Psalm. He even asks in v. 5, “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”

He also says he is oppressed by an enemy, and he feels forgotten. “I say to God my Rock, Why have you forgotten me? Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by the enemy? My bones suffer mortal agony as my foes taunt me.” (V.9-10)

The writer may have been under attack from enemies to his kingdom, from his own family, or even from himself. Many times it is our own decisions that cause our greatest stress and problems. The Psalmist may simply be overwhelmed by a string of relationship strains and bad decisions that have left him feeling depressed and worthless.

The song based on this passage captures the spirit so well. It is beautiful when sung and resonates with the human spirit. Even though the psalmist is suffering in his spirit, and maybe even in his body, he remembers his relationship with God, and based upon that relationship he appeals to him for help. The following verses of the song build upon that relationship.

I was hunting with a friend in Jackson Hole, WY when we saw a mist moving along the edge of a forest. It looked like some kind of a ghost. “What is that?” I asked my friend. “It’s elk,” he said.” I had never seen elk that looked like that.

This was a relatively small area of several hundred acres. It was opening day, and an army of hunters had the elk blocked in. They were running from one end of the wooded area to another. In short order they were overheated, gasping for air, and panting for water. The air was cold and their bodies hot; that is what produced the steam. So thick was the steam that I could not identify the elk in the great mist; I could only watch the cloud move along the forested area. It was amazing.

Photo Compliments of Oz Girl's Photo Shop

That is the story I think of when I read Psalm 42:1 or sing the song based on this verse. “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you.” Like the deer or the elk in my hunting story, we sometimes pant desperately for relief from pain, sorrow, loneliness, guilt, and shame. Panting is not attractive. It the soul’s desperate cry for living water to quench spiritual thirst. Left unquenched, the soul could die. Fortunately, the Psalmist knows where that refreshment may be found - in God.

Fittingly, the next verse of the song reads, “You’re my friend and you are my brother, even though you are a king.” The king of the universe does not sit on a distant throne unmoved by human travail. No, while he does occupy a lofty position, he also moves freely about, ready to provide the water we cry for.

Warren Baldwin